The Pandemic Happening Unnoticed and Contributing to the Demise of Life on Planet Earth: Suvitis

Suvitis, pronouced s-u-vi-tis, is a contagious infection of the mind characterised by the urge or desire to purchase, own and drive a Sports and Utility Vehicle (SUV), or a vehicle that has the expression of an SUV. While it started some time ago in the upper classes of Western society it has spread across the entire planet and all classes making it into a dangerous pandemic.

Signs & Symptoms

People infected with suvitis feel compelled to buy and/or drive an SUV for urban or sub-urban environments, often on the pretended grounds that it is more practical and comfortable. There are three forms of suvitis with signs and symptoms indicating varying degrees of severity:

Causes & Diagnosis

The causes for suvitis are difficult to establish. Those afflicted with the disease put forward comfort and other rational sounding reasons; for instance, arguments purported include but are not limited to:

  • good visibility of the world around while driving due to the elevated driving position,
  • comfortable, but also spacious interior in order not to feel to constraint,
  • four wheel drive for off-road situations or heavy snow.
  • SUVs have relatively small windows, positioned high up, thus creating a large dead zone around the vehicle with no visibility (to the detriment of cyclists, pedestrians and in particular children); moreover, height is relative and it is too easy to get into an arms race,
  • given the overall envelope of a vehicle, SUVs sacrifice the volume to a more powerful engine, the drive train (including three differentials), wheel boxes for larger wheels, etc, resulting quite often a small passenger cabin,
  • urban areas are mostly flat, in England and elsewhere, there is rarely enough snow to warrant a 4x4; moreover, due to the high centre of mass, vehicle handling and cornering dynamics deteriorate.
Gorilla display behaviour to assert his strength (from Die Welt) which has a similarity to behaviour in suvitis.

Prevention & Prognosis

The disease and an infection can be prevented through compassion and awareness of fellow human beings and the world. For instance, in terms of energy expenditure, being larger and heavier as well as more box shaped, hence less aerodynamic, SUVs consume more energy to produce and to drive, obliterating even the effects of electrification. The product offering of new, electric cars in the shape of SUVs makes a mockery of the climate change efforts. Consideration for these detrimental effects on the planet may help to fend off an infection with suvitis. Thinking about the consequences of an SUV on the planet could be one aspect of the prevention for suvitis.


Like many infectious diseases, suvitis is highly contagious and exploits weaknesses of most populations around the world, usually in the adult in the aspiring middle class. Advertising over the past decades has helped to impair the immune system with respect to this disease making people even more susceptible to infection. Over the years a certain desire has been planted in people’s mind, taping into very basic primate instincts of humans and drawing them back to the level of existence mankind has evolved away from.

Works on the technological foundations of autonomous vehicles at Five, UK. Interested in personal mobility, renewable energy and regenerative agriculture.